Going Through the Motions

It's tough for me when it comes to reading the Bible. As important as it is to my life and as fascinating as I find it, I don't read it nearly as much as I should. I read about it and I read material pertaining to it, but the good book itself? Not so much.

It's not for lack of desire. I wouldn't even say that it's from lack of motivation. There's just those periods, those dry spells in my life, that make time spent reading to be fruitless. Nothing of value comes from it. I'm reading the words but nothing is sticking in my head. It's just me going through the motions so I can say that I read from my Bible today.

It occurs to me now that I'm approaching this from the wrong mindset. To say that nothing of value would come out of it would be a lack of understanding. I'm not saying that we should be content with just going through the motions, but we should understand that there is value in obedience. Reading the Bible, prayer, worship, etc. are all ways of expressing and communing to God. It's how we have a relationship with Him. And, like any relationship, we aren't going to be experiencing profound feelings of emotion or understanding each and every time. That's not how it works. If it did, it would make our relationships conditional and lacking in any genuine, meaningful love. God wants us to put in the work and show that He matters to us by obeying Him even when it's inconvenient, boring, or seemingly pointless. He always appreciates us for doing it, even if His love isn't felt in that very moment.

Let me reiterate that we shouldn't be content with going through the motions. We need to learn and change our ways and methods if we expect our relationship to have longevity. But we also need to recognize that hard work and loyalty does not always give instant gratification. If we can do this in our relationship with Christ, then we're certain to have success in other relationships.

-L. Travis Hoffman

3/17/2015

Where We Start and Where We Go

Part of one's beliefs as an adult are solidified by experience. Someone oppressed by Christian parents might leave the beliefs of their family. Those who are raised in a supportive or centralized culture may be more inclined to follow the practices and traditions of those around them. I'm no exception to this. I've been raised in a strongly observant Christian family from birth. Church, orthodoxy, and orthopraxy have always been in my life, however great the degree.

But our experiences at home aren't just the determining factor. Our outside experience is just as important. And whether negative or positive, they still have an impact. In some ways, I feel like it's stronger at reinforcing my faith. I've had some nasty encounters with atheists. Not all of them. Many, in fact, are quite pleasant and respectful. When I think about it, they're usually agnostics. But I've been around some of the most abrasive, condescending, closed-minded people who've identified themselves as non-believers.  Just mean-spirited and unpleasant.

I had to deal with a guy like that once. I was trying so hard to like him. In fact, I did like him. We had some common interests and laughed together quite frequently. But there were moments when he wouldn't shut up. It wasn't that I thought he shouldn't express his opinions and beliefs. I found it really interesting and informative. It was when he would denigrate my beliefs, my convictions, that I found myself biting my tongue. Occasionally, I would try to correct him on something he mistakenly claimed. Yeah, he didn't care. He believed whatever he wanted. After a while, I didn't even bother trying. I'd just nod my head and smile.

During this, and my many other ordeals I've gone through, I've concluded that I would never be that kind of person. My faith would find that conduct absolutely unacceptable. And, in the improbable event I became a non-believer, I would retain the respectful behavior of my former faith.

Now many non-believers would label me, this hypothetical atheist, as an enabler. The so-called "New Atheist" movement. Guys like Richard Dawkins and Christopher Hitchens. Men that believe they have no obligation against using polemics in their quest to eradicate the "evil" and "enslavement of minds" that is religion. Brilliant men, undoubtedly, but intellectual light-weights with regards to philosophy. If the New Atheists would require that from me, I'd rather not be one.

It's not like this doesn't go both ways. People of faith can be very aggressive and uncompassionate. Vindictive and judgemental. I don't blame those out there who have turned away. This seems no different than the New Atheists' attitude.

The Church cannot be this way. It is a spiritual and moral imperative. Truth without compromise, but truth in love. That cannot be stressed enough within the Body of Christ. A follower cannot condemn a person to an existence in hell while speaking of compassion five minutes later. It's blatant hypocrisy and it's wrong. We acknowledge our sins, forgive, repent, and help each other up. We don't deny hell, but we also recognize that we all deserve it when you get right down to it; no one can ever do enough good to measure up.

Through all this, I think about Pascal's Wager. For those who aren't in the know, I'll explain. Blaise Pascal argued that it is to one's favor to believe in God and be wrong than to not believe and be wrong. It's not a perfect argument by itself, but it serves the purpose to what I want to say. Some people won't find Pascal's Wager a compelling enough argument to choose a life in Christ. But, with the love and influence of the Church, we can tip the scales in His favor.

-L. Travis Hoffman

2/24/2015           

The Christian Cursing Conundrum

Another divisive issue. Cursing. Swearing. Four-letter words. You know about them, whether you keep them in your vocabulary or not. And it's stupid. I'm not talking about the words, I'm talking about there even being an issue, altogether. It's such a minor quibble in the scheme of things. I'm not saying we can't tackle multiple problems at once, but should this really have any serious priority?

I know people who live to both extremes and it is quite obnoxious. I knew someone who would cover their ears every time someone around him swore. Infantile. If I come out of an R-rated film with my parents, it's expected for my mom to say, "I could've done without the language," to which I end up rolling my eyes. I also know people who use F-bombs for every other word and it is extremely obnoxious. Oh, and they usually do it in public places and around children. That infuriates me to no end.

Now we can quote the usual scripture about not letting "unwholesome" talk come out or using words that edify others, and I agree with those verses. I don't, however, adhere to legalistic, watchdog nonsense. Context, ladies and gentle-fellows. It means a lot when it comes to scripture.

Consider what might've been viewed as unwholesome conversation during the early days of Christianity. Did you do it? Okay, now what do you look at as unwholesome today? I'm pretty sure poop and fart jokes would've been considered bad taste and sexual topics would definitely be taboo. How about the words "crap", "suck", and *gasp* "piss"? Offensive in 2015? Not so much.  I'm not saying we have carte blanche to use curse words up and down without any sort of conviction. I'm saying what I said before. Context.

If edifying language is the ideal, then unwholesome would likely be the exact opposite. Praising God vs. cursing Him or using His name frivolously. Words of encouragement vs. tearing someone down. Giving blessings vs. telling someone to go to hell. That, my friends, is context.

We should be respectful, though. Even though they might detest salty language, I have the love and respect to not do it around my parents, family, or friends because I value them enough not to make them uncomfortable. Certain friends and co-workers, I do. Many of them don't care and neither do I. No children, though. It's rude.  And I'm not frivolous about it. Mostly because I like showing off my impressive vocabulary.

"If you wouldn't say it in front of God, you shouldn't say it all," my mom would say. To which I respond, "Rubbish" (with due respect to Mom). There are a lot of things I wouldn't do in front of God. Going number two. Making love. Picking my nose. Dancing and singing alone when no one is home. None of these things are bad in and of themselves, but I'd rather in those moments have God looking away for a couple of minutes, had I the choice. I'd say the same idea applies here.

I'm not presenting any real solution here. Those who read this likely won't change their opinion. I get that. I'd say to just take someone else's point of view. Be respectful and use your language appropriately. I've found it very rewarding around my peers.

-L. Travis Hoffman

2/19/2015

Logic's Place in the Christian's Life

Some things just don't make sense in Christianity. They seem contradictory or improbable or downright impossible. Like the Trinity, for example. Or an existence where predestination works hand in hand with free will. I can understand if skeptics find themselves overcooking their noodle over certain concepts within the Bible. My mind can't wrap itself around these ideas, either. I'm left taking it on faith.

See, there's kind of the problem. What is faith? We don't seem to ever have a consistent, clearly-defined meaning for the word. And, depending on the interpretation, the skeptic may or may not be applying faith of some form in their own lives, further complicating the issue. We can't even settle on whether or not faith and reason are compatible or diametrically opposed to one another. Pascal and Kierkegaard supported the latter while Descartes and Thomas Aquinas believed in the former; all of these men were great thinkers and contributers to Christian thought.  Frankly, I'm at a loss as to what to believe.

Not that taking a side is somehow a deal-breaker with Christ or anything. I do wonder, however, whether one's relationship with Christ would be more rewarding intellectually. But then, something occurred to me. What if these elements in our faith, among others, are perfectly within a reason outside our reach?

In high school, I had an Earth Science teacher who told us once or twice that our knowledge of the universe is only as great as the technology that's available to us. Now I never got the impression that she was someone of faith, but her words have always stuck with me. It's a perfectly obvious fact that's lost on us.

Think of yourself as a child. You look at the world and see so many things and you have no idea why they work the way they do or their function. Yet we are completely aware that the adults around us do know these things and, as we grow more mature, we come to learn and understand the world.

I think that's mankind. Maybe the Trinity falls within a completely logical, rational means and we just haven't grown enough in spirit to understand it. Maybe we just need to be one on one with the Lord so He can explain it to us. And I'm okay with that. I think that's fair. It doesn't necessarily mean that the answer isn't available to us in this life. For all I know, God could reveal the answer tomorrow. I doubt it, but it could happen. I guess maybe that's where faith comes in.

-L. Travis Hoffman

2/15/15

Manhood and Complimentarianism

Men and women are not equal. Now before you grab your pitchforks and torches, allow me to elaborate. Men and women are equal intrinsically. God values and loves both sexes and wants everyone to accept the gift of salvation. But they are not equal in terms of purpose. Men and women are physically, mentally, psychologically, and spiritually different and no one debates that. As I continue, please keep that statement in mind to give you perspective.

Equality is a loaded word within today's culture. It's almost always associated with politics, often with volatile response. That's not the equality I'm referring to, although both types affect one another. Instead, I'm speaking of gender roles and responsibilities.

I'm a man. Well, I'd like to be one. I have a lot of work to do in order to achieve manhood. True manhood. Most men aren't men at all. They might do things that our culture defines as "manly", but that doesn't mean they're mature. Promiscuity, self-indulgence, hubris, selfishness, and aggressiveness are not what exists in the heart of a true man. A man is loyal and values the people closest to him and respects others. He defends and he honors while thinking before acting. He sacrifices his time and resources for the sake of those he loves. He admits his faults and apologizes when he's wrong. He listens and has sensitivity. He respects and honors femininity while appreciating and cherishing it. These are the things a man should aspire to.

Unfortunately, we don't. Guys look at these things as touchy-feely and more in the nature of a woman. And that's exactly the problem with guy culture. It's indicative of how complacent we've become. And we wonder why the divorce rate is so high? Really? Rather than make the effort to better ourselves, we make excuses. We resign ourselves to an existence of mediocrity and romanticize it and say that it's okay. And women accept it as being okay. No, it's not.

My dad is a model of true manhood. He isn't perfect and we quite frequently don't see eye to eye, but I don't doubt the quality of his character. He works hard to provide for his family, sacrificing his time and his resources so we could (and can) live comfortably. He's respectful of others. He treats women as a true man should. He makes mistakes, but he has the humility to own up to it. He loves my mom with everything in him. He helped raise my siblings and I and did a fair job of it. I love my father dearly. If I ever become half the man he is, I'll be grateful.

Likewise, my mother fits the definition of a woman. It's in her nature to be nurturing. She works hard. She put her energies into raising us. She valued her children enough to choose them over a career or just making extra cash. She sacrificed time and what little money she had to provide. She cultivated our character and taught us values. She kept us healthy. In matters where my dad is totally clueless, she takes the lead. She loves my dad and respects him and appreciates what he does for her.

Some of you who read the previous paragraph might be infuriated and feel that, in comparison, my mom is depicted as contributing less. And you would be absolutely wrong. In fact, spend a day with any decent mother and you'll discover how incredibly hard-working they can be. Women work hard, but they do it in a different way.

Allow me to reference scripture.

"Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord.  For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything." -Ephesians 5:22-24

Okay, so this sounds like scripture is telling women that they are below men and are there to be glorified slaves. But keep reading.

"Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her..." -Ephesians 5:25

Now we have some context. The first passage instructs women to submit to their husbands, but the second passage commands men to love their wives just like Christ loved the church. Christ submitted himself to the Church. He sacrificed himself and humbled himself for the Church. He died for the church. 

Just like it says wives should submit to their husbands, husbands should submit to their wives. They are just different in their ways. Not one better or lesser than the other. Allow me to make another comparison. The brain and the heart are two of the most important organs in the human body. One cannot survive without these organs. Yet they perform very different functions.  

We shouldn't resist or belittle our gender roles, but embrace them. No one is perfect, but no one should expect to be. We should still acknowledge the strengths of each sex and utilize them. I don't know when I'll achieve true manhood. I also don't know when my future wife will become a woman in the eyes of God. I do know, however, what I should aspire to be and that's enough for now. 

-L. Travis Hoffman

1/14/2015

Merry (?) Christmas

It's been a rough period, lately. A lot of emotional turmoil between myself and friends and the family. Issues of trust, faith, and character. It has really taken its toll on me. This last week, in particular, has been very stressful. There was some conflict with my parents regarding a spontaneous, but well-meaning decision I had made. They had objections to the fact that I would end up missing a work day for the sake of doing this friendly deed. I felt unfairly judged by them. I felt my friend was being unfairly judged by them. I felt like they weren't being compassionate Christians or supportive of me trying to be just that. It came off like they were more concerned about money than anything else. It really irritated me.

I am a responsible person, especially where work is concerned. I understand that a job is important and that one should be reliable in their occupation. At the same time, I can think of moments where my parents have done exactly what I have done and didn't get called out on it. That contributed partially to my vibe that my parents were acting selfish, having that double-standard. I wasn't doing this for fun. And it wasn't. I was being there for a good friend who was hurting. It was physically and emotionally tasking. It was confusing for me and frustrating because I couldn't stay and didn't know what to do to help.

The next few days move slowly, agonizingly slow. I don't hear from my friend. No calls. No texts.  I'm on my knees constantly praying for hours. Come Christmas Eve, I get a couple of texts from my friend and a phone call. Everything is okay. But I'm not convinced. I spend the next hour or two quietly praying to myself and something dons on me.

It's Christmas. Christmas Eve, technically, but the purpose was the same. It's a holiday to celebrate the birth of Jesus. The son of God and the one who gave his life for me. The man who saved my soul. Here I was, focused so much on my woes, and I was losing sight of the most important thing in all life. Realizing this, I made a conscious effort to try and focus on Christ. Yet even still, my worries were dwelling in my mind. Or, more accurately, I was dwelling on my worries. I have no one to blame but myself for this.

This problem continued into Christmas Day. I receive a phone call from my friend and learn that my fears are realized. At least as far as I know. It was a kick to the gonads. I had been lied to by my friend. My friend that I had raced out to comfort and protect and be there for.

Even now, a few hours into December 26, 2014, my worries and sorrows weigh on me. I wanted so badly to have a good Christmas. I wanted to be able to focus on my Christ and I was too stupid to appreciate Him in full. Again, I have no one to blame but myself. After I sign off from my blog, I think an apology in prayer is demanded of me.

-L. Travis Hoffman

12/26/2014 

Being a Loving Christian With a Spine

I sometimes wonder how often I disappoint Christ. Especially when it comes to speaking up and defending the Faith. It's very hard to feel valued and accepted when one holds beliefs that are very much up against the mainstream. Those moments where I manage to work up the nerve to express my views are like walking on eggshells. I feel very nervous, very tense. I don't want to upset anybody. I don't want anyone to have the impression that I'm in any way better or walk away thinking that I believe them to be worthless. Most of all, I just don't want people to hate or reject me.

It occurred to me earlier today as I commented on a friend's facebook post speaking on same-sex marriage. It was making reference to various celebrities who have married umpteen times and/or have cheated on their spouse. The point of the statement being that any claim that gay marriage will corrupt its sanctity is hypocritical when taking into account all the indiscretions of celebrities.  I commented that this was not an honest argument. The majority of those who support traditional marriage would regard these infidelities just as a much a sin as a union between homosexuals. Keep in mind that my comments did not say anything of my own opinion on the issue. I think, if anything, I'd be looked at as someone merely refining an argument, not giving a rebuttal.   Anyway, this started to get very heated and the particular individual I was conversing with told me that I was a bigot and did not deserve his respect. He'd assumed that I had been vehemently opposed to gay marriage, though I still had said nothing at that point.When I finally bothered to give my opinion, which is that gay marriage should be determined through the democratic process, he apologized. I made a point of saying that I had reservations against it, but none that would hold merit from a legal standpoint. We parted company on more-or-less friendly terms, though still disagreeing greatly.

The whole thing has been on my mind all day. Should I have put more emphasis in my convictions against homosexuality? Did I buckle under pressure? The more I ponder it, the more I believe the answer is yes to both questions.

The guy told me I didn't deserve respect. He called me a bigot. The words had cut deep. In that moment I could feel the hate radiating from that guy. Hate that I can honestly say I have never felt toward a homosexual in my life (And I've never harbored hateful feelings for them, anyway). I wish that this revelation had clicked with me at the time. Perhaps I would've been more bold. Perhaps not. I could also have said something really stupid and made things worse. That seems very likely.

Even as a kid, I just wanted to be nice to people and have them be nice back. That's how my folks raised me. Don't be rude or short with people. Don't tease or swear at them or call them names. Just don't be mean. That was the philosophy and I still hold to that today. As a Christian I feel its even more applicable. Jesus loved sinners, right? So should the Church, because we really aren't any better. I try to do that very thing each day. But could I be responding with too much compassion and not enough conviction? Sure, Jesus had unconditional love, but he also said to sin no more. The latter is just as important as the former. Am I being wishy-washy in my approach and being a lukewarm Christian? I really don't want to be that. I want to be like Jesus. I want to be immeasurable in love and generosity while being firm and courageous to stand against the opposition. Alone, if necessary. I want His approval and blessings in life.

I might just be getting too critical of myself. For all I know, I could've very well done the right thing in how I reacted in that situation. That guy might've been left with a positive experience around a Christian when he might otherwise have had poor ones in his past. I'll keep praying about it and continue on with the intention of being stronger in the future.

-L. Travis Hoffman

12/19/2014