The Double Standard with Sex and Violence and Why I'm Okay with It

I don't like sex scenes in movies. I don't care for nudity, either. Call me prudish, but it comes off as gratuitous and unnecessary in a film. Violence, however, I can get behind. In fact, I enjoy certain types of violence. That will sound strange and even unsettling to many who will read this blog entry, but I'm choosing to be honest here. Maybe the word "enjoy" is misleading. It's probably better for me to say that I can be entertained with violence in a film while comfortably seeing it for what it is.

It's been seen said ad nauseum, especially in Hollywood, that it's easier to get excessive violence through the ratings board, whereas it's like pulling teeth to keep a sex scene without any cuts. There's an excellent documentary, This Film Is Not Yet Rated, that discusses this very thing. The director makes use of interviews and compares footage to make a case that the MPAA has a double standard. And it is double standard. Very much so. But I don't see that as a bad thing.

From infancy itself, we are exposed to violence. We experience pain and we know how it feels. When we hit someone, we're scolded for doing so. If our loved ones are harmed, we sympathize and have emotional distress from it. Barring mental and/or psychological problems, we conclude early on that violence is bad. As we get older, we recognize that the use of force can be necessary to prevent even worse acts of violence against others. Regardless, we can still see that violence is painful and to be avoided.

Sexuality is mostly presented at puberty. Before that, our experiences around it are pretty much limited to hugs and kissing. Then somewhere between fourth and sixth grade we're given sex education. It's awkward, uncomfortable, and often quite funny. We learn about our changing bodies and reproduction and all that good stuff. Most importantly, we learn that sex is enjoyable. When we walk out of that class, that is the deepest engrained fact; sex is good.

This is where the problem presents itself. It's true that sex is enjoyable, but it's not always good. It's not always to our benefit, though we often ignore the consequences and go through with it, anyway. Compare that to violence. Violence is painful and bad, but it can sometimes be of benefit in the long run. We hesitate to use violent ends because we know that there will always be painful consequences. There's frequently idiots who will eschew this common sense, but I'd hope that most people are capable of proper discernment.

I believe media contributes to our culture's short-sightedness with sexuality. Think of 10-20 movies that you've viewed that have a sex scene, however explicit or conservative it might be. After you've done that, think of how many of those movies take the time to explore any negative consequences that could or do come about. I'm talking about emotional or psychological turmoil, its effect on other characters outside of the act, STDs, unwanted pregnancies, abortions, etc. How about even the emotional depth of the act itself? I would wager that most of those 10-20 films don't even graze over these topics. If we're realistic, we know that a lot of sexual relationships (especially pre-marital and/or promiscuous ones) come with this sort of baggage.

There's a great quote from David Lynch where he said, "Sex is a doorway to something so powerful and mystical, but movies usually depict it in a completely flat way. Being explicit doesn't tap into the mystical aspect of it, either. In fact, that usually kills it because people don't want to see sex so much as they want to experience the emotions that go along with it. These things are hard to convey in film because sex is such a mystery." For someone who's never had that kind of intimacy, I'm certain that David Lynch hit the nail on the head. But our youth culture doesn't understand the emotion and can only see the physical pleasures of it. I believe that we all want it, but we aren't aware that it even exists.

Just so I can further prove my point, think of 10-20 movies with violent scenes. When you've done that, think of how many movies show characters mourning, reflecting, regretting, experiencing emotional or psychological distress, etc. Count the movies where a person is in pain or dies. Do you see what I'm saying? However explicit or mild, realistic or stylized, violence is honest in its appearance. Most audiences probably don't watch violence for the sake of violence. Porn has a far wider appeal than snuff films. When we watch a violent movie, it's because the bloodshed is a means to an end. It's violence that is used to prevent further, darker atrocities. It's good against evil.  

I'm not about to say that we don't have our share of problems with it. Every year it seems like there's conflicting studies about whether or not video games make children aggressive. Personally, I don't think it does. Not on any substantial level. If I'm wrong, however, shouldn't we be studying whether sexually explicit media increases promiscuity, teen pregnancy, divorce, or depression? Shouldn't this be brought into prominence too? I say yes.

-L. Travis  Hoffman

7/28/2015